Visitors 101 Our most distant cousins have been visiting us for millennia. It is only in relatively recent history since the invention of the camera that their surprisingly friendly visitations have been documented on film. Previously humans relied on written accounts or artistic depictions, some of which we hope to show you should they be released to us soon. However this evidence, when it occasionally surfaces is quickly confiscated or ridiculed and labelled as a hoax, so amazingly these visits remain merely a myth until this day. In dusty boxes hidden in shady museums and secure facilities these pictures are mostly hidden away indefinitely until someone discovers them and is brave enough to leak them onto the internet and into public consciousness. Here is our first batch of pictorial documentation of these visitors throughout the ages. Visitor 066 - c1960s Buster Breaks Free The moonlight fractured through the dense canopy, casting erratic shadows over the forest floor as Buster’s many legs blurred in a frenzied sprint. Tina clung to his broad back, breathless, her sneakers dangling as she tried to keep her balance. “You’d think someone who’s been trapped for thirty years would be a little more grateful,” Tina huffed, dodging a low-hanging branch that Buster apparently didn’t think she needed to worry about. “Grateful?” Buster’s voice was a deep, resonant rumble that carried just enough venom to match his alien origins. “For what? An age of roaches and fluorescent lighting? Spare me your moral platitudes, human.” “Hey!” Tina smacked one of his many legs, which he promptly whipped out of her reach. “I got you out of there, didn’t I? Stuart sent me!” Buster skidded to a stop near a mossy boulder, claws digging into the ground like brakes on a train. “Stuart abandoned me!” he snapped, dropping Tina unceremoniously on the damp forest floor. “Ow! Watch it, Legs!” She scrambled up, brushing leaves from her jacket. “I spent nearly a year staring at the same four walls, waiting for a Durian who never came back. Forgive me if I don’t leap into your arms just because he sent his human pet to save me.” Tina’s jaw dropped. “Pet?! Do I look like I fetch sticks?” “Let me guess,” Buster continued, ignoring her as he began scaling a tree with inhuman speed, “he’s off sipping cocktails in some intergalactic resort while I’m stuck here running for my exoskeleton?” Tina scrambled after him, grabbing onto one of his legs for balance as he hauled her into the upper branches. “Okay, first of all, Stuart didn’t abandon you - he escaped to get help. And second, this ‘pet’ just talked her way past three levels of guards, so maybe give me a little credit!” “Oh, I’ll credit you,” Buster said with a dry laugh, crouching low as the distant sound of shouts and barking dogs drew closer. “For taking a year to show up. Bravo, truly.” “Do you ever shut up?” Tina muttered, clutching onto him as he launched them both to a higher branch. “Only when I’m plotting revenge,” Buster replied, baring teeth that were unnervingly human. “Fine! Be bitter,” she shot back, gripping his spiny shoulder as they leapt to another tree. “But Stuart sent me because he couldn’t trust anyone else. He cares, Buster.” “Cares?” He paused, holding her effortlessly above a gap between branches, dangling her like a sack of flour. “He left me in that place.” “And now you’re out. Thanks to him.” Tina poked his chest with her finger. “So, maybe stop whining long enough to focus on not getting us both caught, huh?” Buster narrowed his eyes. “Hmph. I’ll think about it.” “Yeah, well, think faster!” Tina yelled as a floodlight pierced the trees below. Buster gave a guttural growl, then hurled them both into the shadows above. “You’re lucky I don’t drop you,” he grumbled. “And you’re lucky I have a great sense of humour and hatred of authority,” Tina shot back, holding on for dear life as the two vanished into the night.